Immortality, Hot Tubs, and Pop Tarts

It is a crisp Fall morning, dawning clear and golden on the slopes of Mount Rainier to the southeast, as I ride above Tacoma’s waterfront on the elevated Sounder train to Seattle. Even the Tacoma Box Company building (established 1889) looks elegant in the fresh sunshine of this day. Yet my appreciation of the beauty of this glorious morning is somewhat dimmed by the lack of Pop Tarts.

Under ordinary circumstances this would never have happened. I take prodigious care to ensure the regular provision of Pop Tarts in my little bronze car, the only place where they are (relatively) safe from the ravages of Slug, Weasel and other natural predators. Ever since the catastrophic mouse nibbling incident, I secure them in a clear Rubbermaid container with a MouseAway™ lid. While I have come to prefer the bland reassurance of Brown Sugar & Cinnamon, I am known for my ability to lay aside large quantities of Blueberry, and even Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough, Pop Tarts.

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Joshua put together four bookcases for a pint of Ben & Jerry’s. He has been the envy of all, as he generously shares out his treat, one half-spoonful at a time.

Imagine my shock, dismay, surprise and chagrin when I looked on the back seat of my car and found no faithful plastic bin, no preservative-laced pastries, no breakfast. In the chaos of our recent move to Lakewood, the bin was removed and the pastries likely devoured by some undeserving wretch. And so I must ride without Pop Tarts, woe is me.

One of the reasons I began this blog (apart from the fact that I thought it was a cool idea and it gives me an unparalleled chance to blather on without being interrupted) was that I had begun to feel my mortality. These kind of things occur to me later than for most people; it has only recently begun to dawn on me that I am the father of five children and should (at least occasionally) act like a grownup. It seemed to me that, in the event something happened to me, it would be pleasant to have written down a few thoughts by which my children could remember me, if they were so inclined. As my body continues to age (I am, after all, approaching 39, which is merely a pebble’s toss from the dotage of 40) my thoughts have been more and more fixed on the temporary nature of my sojourn on this planet.

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This was not a ‘posed’ picture — Sarah set this up herself, with no prompting!

It was, therefore, with startling joy this past Saturday, that I remembered a key truth: I am an immortal. I have read many stories (usually fantasy or science fiction) about people who are, for various reasons, immortal. Traditionally, these characters are flawed; often storybook immortals are wearied by their years and jaded by the sameness of life’s pleasures. Many of them have experienced the personal tragedy of watching a beloved one die of old age or other mishap, and are often detached from the world and unconcerned (at least on the surface) with the plight of mortal man. In some cases, they have been disappointed or betrayed so often that they have little or no desire to continue to live. Typical handling of such characters in fiction involves the poignant renunciation of deathlessness in exchange for True Love of some other lofty ideal.

In the beginning, many of the early patriarchs lived for nearly a thousand years, according to the records in the book of Genesis. Many have speculated about these long-lived men, wondering why mankind is now limited to such a comparatively low average of 70 years. Of course, the reason is recorded in Genesis 6:3, as God speaks about His intention to destroy the earth with a flood:

“Then the Lord said, my Spirit will not contend with man forever, for he is mortal; his days will be a hundred and twenty years.”

The generations began to shorten after Noah, who reached the respectable age of 950. Noah’s descendants lived 600, 438, 433, 464, 239, 230, 148, and 205 years, down to Abraham, who lived to be 175. Some argue that the change in the Earth’s atmosphere after the flood and the resulting increased solar radiation is to blame for aging. Others have pointed at the relentless and cumulative impact of sin as the cause for shortened lifespan. Whatever the reason, it is a rare person these days who lives to be more than 100, let alone 120.

When I was in high school or college I saw a movie about a bunch of Immortals who (for reasons that were never clear to me) could only be killed by chopping off their heads, usually after a dramatic sword fight and the exchange of stilted insults. The plot (if you can call it that) required a small group of these sword-wielding maniacs to chase one another around the planet with the brutal goal of absorbing each others’ life energy or something (I was never clear on that part, either) and ultimately becoming some sort of god. It seemed to me that the only thing they were likely to accrue was high dry-cleaning bills, but, hey, I didn’t write the screenplay.

That’s not my kind of immortal. Any who saw me swing a sword would know that the only likely impending decapitation would be my own. Actually, I possess a much better grade of immortality … the kind that cannot be ended by the chop of a blade, poisoned by despair or cheapened by ennui. By the word of the Lord, who does not lie, I am guaranteed eternal life. By faith in Jesus Christ, and according to His grace and mercy, I will live with Him forever. Not some measly 50,000 years, but forever. No end. Ever. It sends a chill down my spine when I think about the amazing infinite nature of this gift of God.

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I have been doing a lot of thinking about time, and readjusting my reaction to the ‘waste’ of ‘my’ time. One recent Saturday, I drove downtown to pick up a rental truck, only to discover that I had reserved the wrong vehicle (actually a cargo van) and that my plans to move would have to be delayed. Driving back to Lakewood, a cheerful peace descended upon me as I remembered that I have (literally) all the time in the world and that it didn’t really matter what I did with today or tomorrow, as long as I gave glory to God and enjoyed Him. I started to sing along with the praise songs on the radio and adjusted my plans to move our furniture on Monday, instead of Saturday.

It seems a little childish, almost, but I get a lot of glee out of the fact that I don’t really have to worry about anything. As Jesus said, in Matthew 6:25:

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not your life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes?”

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One man’s hot-tub is another’s olympic-sized pool.

One of the nice features of our new rental house is a hot tub, nestled into a corner of the deck behind the garage. Although it is in view of the neighboring house, the room that overlooks it is tenanted by a four-year-old, who waves at us cheerfully when we use the tub in the daytime. Mostly we hit the hot tub just before bedtime, enjoying the cool breeze above the water and the stars overhead. It has been a real blessing throughout the move, refreshing our aching muscles after a long day of hauling boxes. There’s nothing like a hot tub to help you to forget your cares and worries, and to reflect on God’s gracious provision throughout the day.

Now that the weekend has passed, today I have to work. I’m sure there will be many worrisome details that will require my urgent attention. But I must admit I’m not really very uptight about it … after all, I’m an immortal.

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Breath of Life

“The Lord God formed the man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being.” Genesis 2:7

Over the course of the past year or two I have had many occasions to remark on the graciousness of God and His many gifts to us. From time to time I have reminded myself that each breath is a gift from God and that without His grace I would not continue to exist. It is one thing to say or think, but quite another to experience.

With five children around the house, Kathy and I are no strangers to illness and injury. Sometimes it seems that every time we place the smaller kids in a church Nursery or expose them in any public venue, they come home sick. This Sunday, when four of the children woke up in varying degrees of sickliness, I stayed home and Kathy attended church with her friend Julee and family.

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Our two-year-old, Sarah, has suffered with a cold for almost a week, and began the day with a squeaky voice and a croupy cough. Most parents will recognize the strange-sounding bark-like cough that is caused by inflammation of the throat passages near the vocal cords … it is a distinctive and worrisome noise.

We kept Sarah under observation throughout the day … she was cheerful and active and seemed to improve as the day progressed … we put her to bed around 8:45 pm, expecting to see her no sooner than 8 am the next morning.

In spite of Kathy’s repeated warnings and admonitions, I stayed up and played a computer game until midnight. She cleverly napped on the couch and was in bed by 10 pm … uncharacteristically early for such a night person as my beloved wife. About 12:30 (just as I had fallen asleep) Rachel woke us up, saying “There’s something wrong with Sarah.”

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I found Sarah standing in her temporary crib, alternately crying and gasping for breath. I carried her to our room, where Kathy held her while I rooted around for our nebulizer and albuterol (medication administered in cool mist form to open up bronchial passages) that we have on-hand to treat David’s occasional wheeziness.

We gave her the albuterol and calmed her down enough to put her back to bed, each labored breath marked by a loud raspy wheeze. I pulled her crib into our room and we all went back to sleep. About 2:30 she woke up again, gasping for each breath as if she were drowning. By this time we were pretty worried. We didn’t dare treat her with the albuterol again … it wasn’t prescribed for her and it didn’t seem to help much anyway. Kathy told me to take Sarah outside for a few minutes while she ran the shower to create some steam. Then she held our toddler on her lap just outside the shower stall while I frantically searched the yellow pages for an urgent care or emergency room facility.

We moved to this new house in Lakewood only a week ago, and we didn’t know where any hospitals or urgent care places are. Although the local phone company had promised service by 5 pm on the previous Friday, they had failed to deliver on this promise, and we had no dial tone. I’m still pretty upset about that … phone companies ought to be required to maintain dial tone between tenants of rental houses and apartments so that people could at least dial 911 for emergency assistance.

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Anyway, I ended up driving to the nearby 24-hour grocery store and asking one of the cashiers for the location of a nearby hospital. He gave me directions and I rushed home. Sarah was still not getting any better, and we felt it was time to get her some medical attention. I plopped her in her car seat and rushed off through the rain-covered streets, praying that the clerk’s directions were accurate.

After what seemed an eternity, but was probably less than 12 minutes, I found the hospital and (after one wrong turn) parked in the emergency room lot. Sarah’s breathing had become more and more labored as we drove, and she began to choke and vomit as I tried to unbuckle her from the seat, no longer breathing at all. I threw her face-down over my arm and pounded her little back with my palm as I ran for the emergency room door.

The place was empty except for a receptionist, who rose halfway out of her chair as I rushed in, perhaps fearing for her own safety.

“She’s not breathing … I need help NOW!” I yelled.

Her look of alarm at my charging arrival changed to a focus of concern for Sarah. Her eyes narrowed in critical appraisal, and she said to me, “She IS getting some air.”

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Sure enough, the vomiting and choking had stopped, and she was actually breathing, in a gasping sort of way. The receptionist led me quickly back to a cubicle and several nurses cleared Sarah’s airway and sat her up on a hospital bed. They gave her a shot of some kind of steroid that was intended to reduce the inflammation, and began with a breathing treatment of some kind. They attached a monitor to her toe that measures the saturation level of oxygen in her blood … the nurses seemed relieved to see that the percentages were in the high 90′s, perhaps indicating that she was getting the air that she needed, even if it was less than was comfortable.

She looked so tiny on that big hospital bed, surrounded by hospital technicians and medical machines. Her face was pale and tear-streaked, and her little lips were purple. I thought to myself, “This is one little girl that we CANNOT do without.”

Thanks be to God for preserving my daughter’s life! I shudder when I consider all the factors that could have conspired to delay my arrival at the emergency room, or the possibilities that could have prevented us from knowing about her plight in the first place.

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After continuing with several breathing treatments, the emergency room doctor recommended that Sarah be transferred via ambulance to a children’s hospital in downtown Tacoma. They put in an IV, which was painful to watch, and difficult to explain to my little Muffin. By this time Sarah had developed a deep distrust of all medical persons, and would answer only a tearful “No!” to all questions posed by people in lab coats, no matter what they said. I rushed home to get a change of clothes for Sarah and to inform Kathy of Sarah’s condition and destination while they waited for medical transport … then I rode with Sarah to the children’s hospital in the back of the ambulance.

Ultimately we were transferred to a room upstairs in the hospital after another breathing treatment or two and a long wait in the emergency room of the children’s hospital. The expressed intention was to keep Sarah under observation overnight. Kathy had the dubious privilege of sitting at home beside a disconnected phone wondering what was going on with Sarah and how I would communicate.

Happily, she began to show substantial improvement later in the day and we were eventually released just before dinner. We managed (with no little difficulty) to persuade Sarah to imbibe her anti-inflammatory steroid (this time in capsule form, ground up in applesauce) and put her to bed. Kathy slept with her in one of the other bedrooms so that I could catch up with my rest and go to work the next day. In the morning, Kathy brought Sarah into our room and I spent ten or fifteen minutes just lying next to her, watching my little girl sleep. It is a tremendous privilege to be a parent, but it does not come without the occasional moment of terror.

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Sarah is back to her normal self now, and will probably retain no recollection of this experience, but I think it is something I will remember for the rest of my days. I cannot imagine what it would be like to lose a child, and I’m pretty sure I don’t want to find out.

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More Pictures of the Lakewood House

Kathy is in Texas, and wanted to show off a few more pictures of the house we are renting. Since I’m just lolling around the house eating meatloaf (Rachel says it is the best meatloaf ever, thank you, Kathy!), I don’t mind posting a few more. Sorry to those of you who are bored with it.

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The stairs & entry-way

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The living room, just to the right as you enter the house.

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More of the living room, looking toward the back of the house.

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The den — a dark sort of room at the back of the house, behind the kitchen, with a fireplace & half-bathroom.

There is a three-car garage and a hot tub, which sweeten the deal a little. This house is $100/month more than a comparable house in the area, but the yard makes a big difference (the other house had only about 1/3 of the yard space).

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A New Home

We’ve decided to rent a house in Lakewood for the next year or so.

Here are a few pictures of the house we’ve selected:

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The front of the house (picture cleverly doesn’t show how close the neighboring houses are).

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The fenced backyard was a major selling point, with a basketball court and lots of room to run around.

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The kitchen is always an important part of any house — this one seems roomy enough.

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With a three-car garage and square footage around 2400 sq. ft., this four-bedroom house should be a similar fit to our existing space.

We’re both relieved and scared about making this change … it will certainly be a much shorter commute for me, and I seem to want to hang onto this job for a while. But moving (even locally) will be non-trivial.

When we talked on the phone this morning, Kathy said to me, “Do you think maybe this time we could actually declutter?” We both had a good laugh at that.

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A New Look

I just noticed a man across the aisle from me, sporting a Mohawk haircut … I can’t remember the last time I saw someone making that definitive personal statement. It is frequently interesting to see the different ways that people express their individuality. Most people nail down who they are by the time they are in their 30s, though … this guy looks to be in his late 40s. He is wearing a T-shirt from the Seattle Children’s Theater … perhaps the cut is a part of a role he is playing.

When I was in college, a friend decided to shave his head for his 20th birthday. I walked down to the barber shop with him for a good laugh. The barber, an older man well-versed in the ways of college students, gave my friend lots of chances to back out, removing his hair in uniform layers until only an eighth of an inch stubble remained. Somehow I found myself in the chair, with a grinning barber asking, “Are you sure you want to do this?”

“Sure!” squeaked a voice that I still can’t believe was mine. No baby-step approach for me … in a single swoop, he cut a reverse Mohawk from the front of my head to the base of my neck. I walked out of the shop looking like a skinhead, and (I hope) a little wiser.

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Would you buy a used car from this man? (This picture was actually taken much later, when I had quite the ‘head of hair’ in comparison to the original near-billiard shave.)

We had been enjoying a prolonged Indian Summer, with temperatures in the low 70′s. The next day (November 2, 1984) we skipped right past Fall and into Winter, with temperatures below freezing at night. My friend and I bought matching pea-green coats and walked around town like a couple of idiots, shivering miserably. I never realized just how much heat can be lost from the top of the head, when denuded of hair.

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Before

The other day, one of our neighbors came by to show off her new hair color … she is starting high school in a few weeks and wants to change her look as much as she can. Hard to imagine anyone choosing to go brown when they are naturally blond, but she seems to have selected an attractive shade … it looks good. I think that I am going to need to be very flexible as my children move into the teen years … most parents really seem to struggle with their reaction to matters of aesthetics and in differentiating those from moral principles. It is also hard to see your child as a potential grown-up, when you remember (seems like yesterday!) changing their diapers and snuggling them in your arms.

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After

One of my favorite scenes from “Father of the Bride” is when Steve Martin’s character’s daughter announces her intention to get married. In the film, they swap out the daughter in mid-conversation and replace her with a six-year-old girl in pigtails, who announces in a little-girl voice, “Daddy, I met a boy and I’m going to get married!” Then Martin shakes his head, his vision clears, and he sees his 20-year-old daughter again, looking at him strangely. I suspect parents go through that kind of thing frequently.

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