The Rest of the Appendix Tale

Parts Tim left out in his appendix story:

“I don’t have appendicitis, it must be all those fruits and veggies we’ve been eating. Look, I can jump up and down ten times. I’m pretty sure any sharp movement would hurt if it was my appendix.”

Tim jumped up and down in my mom’s small Texas kitchen, refusing to believe he could be sick with anything serious.

Tim looks so healthy here.

Tim looks so healthy here. This is obviously a “Before” picture.

“Besides, Joshua got appendicitis on our last day in Texas years ago, it would be too much of a weird coincidence if I got it too. I mean, go figure. The irony. Haha.”

Fast forward two hours. Returning home from the library, where we had internet, researched some of Tim’s symptoms and made contact with one of my favorite all time nurses (aka Kirstin), we looked over the house for Tim.

Who was in bed, moaning.

“We don’t need to do any pressure tests, it’s definitely my appendix. Pain in my right side. Not going away. We need to make our way to the hospital.”

Ah, the irony.

This, of course, was not as easy as it sounds. We were in a little town, hours from a major city, with a rental car that was only in Tim’s name, and we had a flight to catch in Dallas in less than three days.

We made a series of calls –

Can we change our flight without a fee? No.
Even in a medical emergency? No.
What hospital is covered by our insurance? 2 Random Names of hospitals we’d never heard of.
Is there a car rental place nearby where we can add another driver? No.
To the older kids back at home in Washington – “No worries, we’re just heading to the hospital. Yep, appendicitis. I know, the irony.”

Tim didn’t want to uproot my mom and the kids, but I did NOT want to be alone in a strange city with my husband in the hospital. So we packed everything up, grabbed food out of the fridge, locked up the house, and set off for San Antonio.

Tim, being honorable and stubborn and unwilling to break our car rental contract, insisted on driving the 2 plus hours to San Antonio.

“Kathy,” he managed to gasp out after a bump in the road caused him to flinch in severe pain, “I can just see us getting stopped while you’re driving, getting a ticket or in an accident and on top of everything, having to pay a stupid fine to the car rental place! I am okay to drive.”

Sometimes I am amazed at Tim’s integrity and honor. He was not willing to violate the rental agreement and, in some sense, place us outside of God’s protection, even if it meant his own personal discomfort.

So we drove at a (safe) break-neck speed to San Antonio. First stop – the car rental place. He threw the keys at me and we hurried (okay, he mainly stumbled) into the office, added my name to the account, and were even waived the fees for switching the car return from Dallas to San Antonio. Bless Tim’s honest heart!

And then I picked which hospital to go to:

Kathy – to the Random Night Clerk at the car rental agency – “Um, so our insurance covers two hospitals in San Antonio. Which one should we go to?”

Random Night Clerk – “Methodist. My mom had surgery there this year and they took good care of her, I think. She seems okay now.”

Great, that’s good enough for me. Thank the Lord for Google maps and my phone. We found the hospital and got Tim settled into the ER.

Also, praise God for friends who take care of me (even from 1000′s of miles away). My dear friend Michelle (who knew I was pretty much INCAPABLE of making any more decisions – that whole hospital choice had exhausted me) figured out a hotel for us – sent me the address, got me set up with a discount and Google Maps pointed us in the right direction. Ahhh. Sleep.

While Tim was waiting for care in the hospital, we toured San Antonio. Nothing like ignoring the suffering patient and sight-seeing with the other summer tourists. Bad wife or resourceful mom? It’s a toss-up.

River Walk

River Walk

This was the call I did get in the middle of our yummy meal out that day (love Tex-Mex food!):

“Hey sweetie.”
“Tim, are you okay? Have they scheduled things yet?”
“No, I’m still waiting for the doctor, but these pain meds are GREAT!”
“Oh, good. We’ll be there soon.”
“Okay, listen, I just wanted you to know that the doctor told me last night that there was a little tumor on one of my kidneys.”

::silence::
“What?”
“Yeah, so I didn’t want to worry you last night.”
“Um, or this morning when I was there at the hospital?”
“Heh, heh. No, but I did want to tell you before I went into surgery. You know, so you’d know what was going on and all.”

::silence::
“Tim.”
“Yes, dear?”
“You are NOT allowed to get cancer and die, do you understand me?”
“Yes, dear. Enjoy your lunch and say hi to your mom and the kids for me.”

My phone, which was obviously exhausted from all my Google Map usage, died in the middle of our walk and I totally missed Tim’s call saying he was going into surgery. Cue bad wife moment.

My wonderful, generous, caring aunt and uncle covered some of our expenses as we moved to a hotel right off the River Walk and close to the hospital.

We had to go see the Alamo.  We were in San Antonio.  We had time.

We had to go see the Alamo. We were in San Antonio. We had time.

Tim did fine during surgery (except for that whole bursting of the appendix near the end and all). He was up and walking almost immediately. Why? Because we had a flight to make in Dallas early Friday morning (surgery was Wednesday night).

How far is it from San Antonio to Dallas? FOUR HOURS!!

Yes, it was his plan to come out of the hospital, after an emergency appendectomy, hop in the car to drive through the night and then get on a plane for a day of flying back to Washington State.

Did I mention Tim is godly, honorable, and STUBBORN??

We worked through all sorts of schemes. A friend from church offered to fly the kids home so I could stay longer with Tim while he recuperated at the hospital. My mom offered to take the kids back to her house at Fort Clark and stay there while I waited at the hospital for Tim. Tim’s dad called and said he would take a flight from WA and bring David and Sarah home with him.

We were all waiting and trying to see how serious Tim’s surgery was and how his recovery would be. The tumor/cancer threat was in the back of everyone’s mind. Except maybe Tim.

Tim, of course, was determined to get on home. He got out of bed as soon as they would let him and started walking laps around the hospital. Then he proceeded to convince his nurse, who convinced the doctor, who convinced me, that he was fine and could leave in order to make the flight home. Craziness.

Before I could arrange anything with the kids, Tim was released and ready to go. We drove straight to the airport.

“Let’s make our appeal to the airlines in person and see if they’ll waive the flight changes,”
I said, hoping the sight of Tim in a wheelchair and orthopedic socks would move even the hardest of hearts.

“Yes, because if not, we’re driving to Dallas tonight and getting on that other flight,”
he said, looking a bit pale despite his bold words.

You can't see the yellow socks - they're impressive.

You can’t see the yellow hospital socks – they’re impressive.

Sure enough, once again, the Lord went before us. We had an extremely gracious airline representative whose manager immediately changed our flights WITHOUT any fees or costs and sent us on our way. It meant we would miss Joshua as he flew back to college that same day, but it was the best we could do.

So, cough, cough, since Tim was now able to actually rest for the day, I took the kids and my mom and set off to enjoy one more day of vacation. We drove all the way back to my mom’s house in Fort Clark (she wasn’t due to return to Michigan for a few more weeks) and spent the day swimming and relaxing.

Off to the pool while Tim sleeps back at the hotel.

Off to the pool while Tim sleeps back at the hotel.


Pool Wonder Powers - activate!

Pool Wonder Powers – activate!

Ahem, we checked in on Tim every few hours. Probably kept him from resting with our care. The next morning we said good-bye to my mom, drove back to San Antonio, picked up Tim at the hotel, and flew on home to Washington.

Where we were met by more of our awesome friends. “We love to spend our date night picking up people at the airport,” they actually said. Bless their hearts!

And came home to fresh groceries, beautiful flowers and our own beds. Ahhh. We would deal with the cancer part later. And, praise, praise, praise the Lord, as Tim shared, it was handled easily through a long, but not complicated, surgery.

There's even some Nutella for the patient.

There’s even some Nutella for the patient.

Just thought I would fill in some of the untold parts of the story.

Kathy

Share or follow

Related posts:

“Your Appendix Saved Your Life”

Back in July, we traveled to Arkansas to attend my nephew’s wedding. It was a bit tricky getting everyone there, since the older kids were serving as counselors at Wilderness Northwest, attending Worldview Academy, and serving as Junior Staff at The Refuge. Using all my crafty mileage tricks, we found flights to Dallas for everyone. Renting a van and reassembling the family from our scattered flights, we drove through the night to Siloam Springs, where the wedding was held.

Tim and Sunny, becoming a new family.

Tim and Sunny, becoming a new family.

Since I am fairly frugal with airfare, I scheduled a visit to Fort Clark (our family’s favorite West-Texas vacation spot) and arranged to meet Kathy’s Mom in Dallas. We spent a lovely week in the hot Texas sun, but then I became sick.

The diamond-shaped pool at Fort Clark is the length of a football field.

The diamond-shaped pool at Fort Clark is the length of a football field.

Soon it was evident that I had appendicitis (we’re old pros at appendicitis, since both Joshua and Daniel had appendicitis back in 2006, six months apart). Driving two hours to the hospital in San Antonio, I presented myself in the Emergency Room, and was, in the course of time, triaged and examined. They scheduled me for a CT scan, but seemed unimpressed with my self-diagnosis. The lab tech later told me that 90% of patients complaining of appendix troubles are actually suffering from something else.

So I was quite smug when the CT scan revealed that I was, in fact, suffering from acute appendicitis, and needed immediate surgery. Not long after that, the doctor on duty at the ER poked his head into my cubicle.

“Um, we got back the results from your CT scan,” he told me nervously. “There was something else, in addition to the appendicitis.” He edged away from me, as though my ailment was contagious.

Not my actual CT scan machine, although it looked exactly like this one.

Not my actual CT scan machine, although it looked exactly like this one.

“Oh really?” I tried to muster interest, but an inflamed appendix has a way of focusing my attention to the exclusion of other concerns.

“Yes, it seems you have a tumor on your kidney, between 3 and 4 centimeters in diameter.”

Without any further explanation, the doctor found work to do elsewhere. It seemed very strange, to me, but then I didn’t really care, because they soon gave me a substantial dose of morphine, which cheered my outlook considerably.

It was a long night, and an even longer day, but eventually the surgeon found time to remove my appendix (which burst while he was taking it out). Along the way someone mentioned the word ‘cancer’ in reference to the kidney tumor, a word the ER doctor had carefully avoided saying.

David and Sarah tried hard to cheer me up as I recovered from surgery.

David and Sarah tried hard (and mostly succeeded) to cheer me up as I recovered from surgery.

Later, I found out that 90% or more of kidney tumors of this type are cancerous, and that 4 centimeters was considered the maximum size for optimal surgical removal. Apparently, tumors that grow to be larger than that tend to impact the kidney function and often spread to other organs in the body.

Through a long series of unlikely events, God brought us back home to Washington without having to pay extra fees to the airline or to the rental car company. In every detail, God was there, paving the way for us so that I could recover and get back home without using extra vacation or cash. While we were still in Texas, several friends back home called around and made me an appointment with the best urologic surgeon in the area.

My favorite urologic surgeon

Frank, my favorite urologic surgeon

By the following Tuesday, I was just beginning to feel human again — just in time for my appointment with the surgeon. Soon we sat in his examination room, peering at the CT scan results.

“Your appendix saved your life,” doctor Frank told me, confidently. “If you hadn’t had this CT scan, it would have been years before you noticed this kidney, which is almost certainly cancerous. The cancer would have grown spread through your lymph nodes, and would have been much more difficult to stop, even with chemo and radiation. As it is, I think we can remove it surgically and send you on your way.”

About six weeks later, the surgeon removed the tumor, which was, in fact, cancerous. He was able to save much of the kidney, and the tissue removed had clear margins, so the prognosis is very good. I’m very relieved to be cancer free without having to undergo chemo or radiation therapy, especially as I have recently learned a little more about the side effects of such drastic cancer-fighting treatments.

Greg and Tina who happened to be in town, watched the kids while I was in surgery the second time.

Greg and Tina who happened to be in town, watched the kids while I was in surgery the second time.

The long and short of it is this: through all these adventures, God showed Himself to be present and gracious and powerful in my life. He bent over backward to arrange matters so that I could not ignore or explain away His involvement in my situation. He showed that He loves me and that He still has work for me to do, or character to acquire, before He calls me home.

I know that God does not always intervene by healing the sick. Kathy’s Dad died very suddenly just three years ago, of an aggressive form of lymphoma, while hundreds prayed for his life to be spared. But when God does intervene to heal, it makes you want to sit up and take notice.

My appendix didn’t save my life — my God did that. Now I am left to wonder why, and how I can be faithful to use that life in a way that pleases Him.

Tim

Share or follow

Related posts:

First Day of School 2014

Sarah wanted me to take pictures and write a blog about The First Day of School in 2014. Hmmmm. I’m looking around the house from my computer chair at the sight before me.

Sarah, I need to borrow your glasses to get a good look at this house!

“Sarah, I need to borrow your glasses to get a good look at this house!”

  • three Advent boxes to be put away sitting on top of a Christmas bin that needs to go back into the garage
  • a pile of unfolded laundry on the chair
  • a basket of laundry on the floor
  • some random clothes Joshua forgot to take back to school with him (found in the washer yesterday)
  • a big school binder nestled amidst the laundry
  • dvds, a Christmas present we forgot to mail, and math scratch paper on my desk
  • two bags of recycling that are neither in the pantry (tidy) or taken out to the recycling bin but seem to want to sit in the hallway
  • three cups from dinner that didn’t make it to the dishwasher
  • a half finished container of apple juice sitting on the kitchen table
  • and the school schedule STILL not quite finished for January

Um, Sarah, this is not really a great photo-worthy day.

And that’s just this room. Who knows what the dining and living rooms look like.

David, you need a sip of my espresso to survive this day!

“David, you need a sip of my espresso to survive this day!”

What did we accomplish today (since it obviously wasn’t all about housekeeping and tidying)? Let’s see:

  • Daniel and David both had online classes for which they were ready and prepared
  • Sarah, David and I read our Bible devotions this morning and each filled up a page in our thankful journals
  • Rachel started classes back up at Pierce College with professors she enjoys and where she is excelling
  • Two children had piano lessons – completed songs, picked up new ones and filled the house with music
  • Tim worked from home and spent time talking and encouraging and counseling each of the kids during the course of the day
  • We did school – read books, worked math problems, studied science, and reviewed grammar
  • We Skyped a dear friend in Thailand
  • I talked to my mom in Michigan (where they have 11 inches of fresh snow)
  • I texted Joshua off at college (where classes were cancelled because of the cold)
  • I got a great new hair cut and color.
  • Tim, Rachel, Daniel and I all managed to fit in a work-out at the fitness center.
This is how the boys look at me, sometimes, when I suggest a quick "10 Minute Tidy!!"

This is how the boys look at me, sometimes, when I suggest a quick “10 Minute Tidy!!”

There was laughter, lots of hugs, yummy meals together and good conversations. There was correction, hurts, forgiveness, more hugs and a day full of living out what it means to be a FAMILY.

Sarah, you were right. This was a GREAT first day back to school!

Share or follow

Related posts:

Goal Procrastination

Each year, our pastor preaches a sermon about setting ‘noble goals’.

Don’t get me wrong, it is a good sermon. He changes it up a bit each year, but the general thrust of it is that we should set godly goals so that we can please God and grow in spiritual maturity. Through such goals we can also discover what God wants us to do, and build our faith as He empowers us to accomplish them.

Even when I start out the service with a firm determination not to make any goals, by the end of the sermon, I’m convinced that I should rush out and write down a list of goals immediately. To add insult to injury, this year our pastor set aside a full minute at the end of the service so we could start to write goals on our bulletins. Then he stood up front and watched us, to make sure we were writing.

I should note, our family sits in the third row.

I, of course, am an Olympic-class procrastinator, and so I take it as a bit of a challenge, when Pastor Jim throws down the ‘goal gauntlet’. This year I am hoping to make it well into February without setting any kind of goals, but the pressure is definitely mounting.

David and Sarah, goal-setters extraordinaire.

David and Sarah, goal-setters extraordinaire.

Some years, I have an easy-out — I tell myself that I will write my goals when I go to the Great Commission Conference at Jefferson Baptist Church (which falls later in January). That buys me a few weeks, but exposes me to another of these disciplined, meddlesome, goal-setting pastors, so it is a mixed blessing.

But this year I’m not going to Oregon for the conference, so that excuse is out.

Another favorite reason to hold off on goal setting is to suddenly have no access to paper, writing implements and/or computers. As Pastor Jim says, “A goal is not a goal unless it is written down.” But that alibi is a little far-fetched, especially when I am writing this blog, and clearly have access to a computer, not to mention smart phones which abound. So much for that alibi, unless I want to break both my wrists in the next few days.

As a parent, I do have an obligation to avoid placing stumbling blocks in front of my children, so I don’t want to be too overt or successful in writing down a long list of impressive-sounding goals. This might kill my kids’ joy and make them unwilling to ‘own’ their responsibility to set goals. So I could put off writing my own goals out of a high-sounding desire to leave room for my children to make goals without being overshadowed by my ‘ultra-maturity’ and ‘hyper-spirituality’. Yes! This sounds like a good pretext for my list!

Big sister leads the way!

Big sister leads the way!

But on the first of January, Rachel corralled her sister Sarah and two hapless friends who had spent the night, and sat them down at the kitchen table with pen and paper. “Write your goals,” she told them firmly. Then she glared at them sternly until they all had produced a list of goals. So much for not being a stumbling block for my children — I’m four days behind already!

I seem to be running out of rationalizations. Perhaps I’ll come up with a draft list of goals, but somehow never quite finalize it. (This is actually my most effective strategy, since a goal without accountability is actually better than no goal at all, from the perspective of a master-procrastinator).

Truth be told, all this talk about goals has me exhausted — I’d better quit. Maybe I’ll come back and finish this another day.

Tim

Share or follow

Related posts:

They’re as Tall as Church Steeples!

Back in 1999, when we first moved to Washington, Kathy and I had only three children. Then David and Sarah were born in 2001 and 2002, and suddenly we were a tribe. As my foul-weather friend Tom used to say, “Tim has five children, but they ride like a thousand.”

When your kids are small, you sometimes wonder if they will ever be out of diapers. Twice in our family history, we have had two in diapers at the same time, which is definitely too much of a good thing.

Which way is the beach?

Which way is the beach? The beach is that way.

These days things are a little different. With two of my sons standing well over six feet, and another with a gleam of upward-mobility in his eye, I often feel a bit diminished in comparison. I find myself seeking the high ground when we are photographed together, not that it does any good.

I am reminded of the line in Seven Brides for Seven Brothers in which one of the town girls describes the Pontipee men. “They’re all as tall as church steeples,” she exclaims in admiration.

A couple of weeks ago I had a follow-up appointment from my kidney surgery (more about that on another day).

“How tall are you?” the doctor asked, in a voice that seemed to hold very little interest in my answer.

“Oh, 5-foot-10 1/2, maybe 5-foot-11 on a good day,” I told him, chuckling nervously.

Brusquely, he measured me. “Nope. 5 foot, 10 inches,” he informed me with a minimum of compassion. Gone, apparently, are the days in the Army when a charitable staff sergeant measured twenty-year-old-me at 6 feet even. Or maybe the cares of the world and the weary work of parenting has bowed me down to a shadow of my former height?

My three sons

My three sons a-looming.

Daniel’s life ambition is to be taller than Joshua, and he seems well on his way, if only by craftily choosing his ground. I guess I will have to take refuge in the fact that I still outweigh them each by a significant margin.

Tim

Share or follow

Related posts: