Dan and My Van

Daniel doesn’t currently have a job. He’s put in lots of applications and has some leads going, but right now he’s unemployed. Which is difficult when you have bills to pay. And you like to drive a car to school and not take the bus.

Such a cheerful worker!

We are a very easy going family in many ways. We aren’t overly scheduled or structured. I’m afraid Tim and I are just too relaxed, easy-going, fun, (lazy?) to run our lives and the home in a austere or overly orderly manner. That means things are often a bit of a mess, we’ll drop work for ministry and fun, we miss appointments (not on purpose), and we get behind in projects at times.

We can’t all live the life of ease and luxury like Marco.

We try to encourage the children to be servant-leaders and to invest in our family and the lives of others. When the older kids were home (ie before college) and managing busy schedules, we often set aside “Bless the Family” time on weekends. We asked the children to spend some intentional time working on a project or cleaning chore that blessed the home in some tangible way before they went off with friends or to work.

As Daniel finds himself without work and funds, I want to encourage him. I want him to be a diligent hard worker. If he can’t work outside the home, than he can labor for me. He can put some of his available time and energy into blessing the family.

A few weeks ago, I told Daniel he had to get some side jobs in order to use my van that week. Or at least TRY to get some work. Within minutes of posting on FB, he had a yard work job. And that job led to another project. Yesterday I had a LONG meeting up in Auburn. Tim and the kids were all off at the Duckabush for a CIT meeting. Before I left for my appointment, I wrote down a list of things Daniel needed to do (before Monday morning) if he wanted to use my van.

A few chores

Of course, I forgot to tell anyone that I made that list. Heh heh. Around 9:45 pm I remembered. A quick call in to Tim set Daniel to work. When I arrived home at midnight, the chores were all crossed off and the place looked neat and tidy. [Kudos to David for doing all the dishes and cleaning the kitchen as well while Daniel worked on other things.]

Today Tim asked Daniel (who wanted to take a car to pick up friends and go to an Ultimate Frisbee Game), “What can you do that will make us glad for you to be off using the van? And not in a, ‘Dan, you need to get out of here you’re causing trouble!’ sort of way.” LOL! “What can you do to help around the house that will show that you are a blessing and a joy to have around?”

My Van – getting all freshened up.

I love how Tim crafts things in ways that empowers the children and gives them the opportunity to earn respect. I tend to “mother” and nag and make lists. Ahem. Well, I am a mother, so I guess that’s somewhat expected. Tim’s approach, however, let Daniel “own” the work and be a part of the decision making process, even if it was only regarding a small thing. Daniel still needed some ideas, but he had sovereignty and control of what work he did.