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WFMW – Life Skills

wfmwSeveral weeks ago I was talking with a friend about my struggles to Do It All as a homeschooling mother of five. This godly woman is an amazing problem solver, and within minutes she had several ideas specifically addressing my scheduling and organizational needs.

I cannot reveal her name.

There are times when it is best to protect a person’s anonymity. This is especially true when there are five children (at least one of whom is a rather hulking teenager) that cherish their free time.

hulking teenager at rest

Joshua works on his menacing look.

At the onset, my beloved offspring were not exactly enamored with my friend’s involvement in our daily lives. What she suggested has made a dramatic change to our schedule. After our conversation, I immediately brainstormed how to put it into practice. Although the children have grown accustomed to this new system, and even appreciate its simplicity and structure, I feel it is best not to divulge the true origins.

Plus, I like to keep the rascals guessing. It’s important to have some aura of mystery and lofty wisdom as a mother.

Life Skills

There are many people in this diverse and beautiful world who are naturally organized. God love them.

I am NOT one of those people.

Despite my many housekeeping shortcomings, however, I do like things somewhat clean and tidy. When my home is cluttered and messy, I feel suffocated and overwhelmed. I need some order in my life. Homeschooling five children is not the ideal situation for cultivating a well-kept home. We live, really live, in our home all day.

These children never go away!
[Deep breaths]
But I digress.

My friend’s idea was this: build an hour of Life Skills into our daily homeschooling schedule. Life Skills could relate to everything from chores to cooking, budget lessons, lawn work, or even babysitting instruction. I absolutely loved the idea! It was perfect and could be applied to so many different areas of life.

I decided my most crucial need was regular, structured help in keeping up the house. The kids are wonderful and regularly assist in picking up the house, but when I look around at our messy home and shout,

“We need to clean the Entire House – Right Now!”

they are often overwhelmed and paralyzed…or hiding in the hall closet.

Not to throw stones; at that point I’m usually overwhelmed and panicked as well.

rachel and sarah

Look Sarah, let’s take a picture of Mommy having a meltdown.

Life Skills has changed everything. I hate to sound dramatic, but this simple addition to our schedule has truly transformed things in our home. I don’t have to worry as the house begins to look messy and cluttered during the day, I know at 4 pm the cry Life Skills will go forth, and by 5 pm the entire house will be picked up and fresh.

It’s heavenly!!

Here are the basic steps on how we developed the practice of Life Skills:

  1. Divide up the house
  2. Make a list all the rooms of the house (don’t forget the laundry room)
  3. Write down the basic chores needed in each area
  4. Group areas together according to size and complexity of work
  5. Assign a weekly rotation
  6. Find a time in your daily schedule that would accommodate an hour of Life Skills
  7. Go For It!

My older three children each handle one meal (dishes, clearing table, loading and unloading the dishwasher etc) a day. They are assigned that meal for the week, at which point they rotate. We have practiced this for several years now and it (typically) works smoothly.

I decided to combine the Life Skills job with the meal rotations. Rachel helped me to break down our home into specific work areas and then coordinate the jobs with existing positions. We delegated the smaller areas of the house to the younger children and included them on the meal appointments.

For example, the child with the breakfast assignment is also responsible for tidying the living room and downstairs bathroom. Lunch has the upstairs bathroom and the laundry room (neaten room, gather dirty clothes and run a load of laundry). Dinner (which is a big responsibility, taking the longest amount of time to complete) is in charge of the family room and hallway (smaller areas).

David and Sarah (my almost 7 and 5 year olds) assist their siblings with meal and laundry chores and handle the dining room, stairs, and upstairs hallway. They rotate jobs as Little Buddy 1 and Little Buddy 2.

little buddy what's his name

This Little Buddy is taking a Little Break.

Once a week the children are responsible for giving their section a thorough cleaning (wash floors, vacuum, dust, etc). Because the children are so efficient and the house is now being picked up on regular basis, I was able to add in a 10 minute bedroom clean up to the Life Skills roster.

Another friend has suggested I include a Clean the Minivan job. You can see the options are limitless.

life skills did him in

Mother, I beg you, please don’t any anything more to Life Skills.

There you have it. A rather lengthy and detailed description of how we apply Life Skills to our day. If you have any questions, please leave a comment and I’ll do my best to confuse you further help clarify things.

Drop by Don’t Try This At Home and see other Works for Me Wednesday links.

Kathy

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Better Than Sleep

I had a whole post written out (okay, so it was in my head) about the power of scripture and staying in the Word. I spent a good portion of yesterday catching up on my Bible study homework. I’m going through Beth Moore’s study on the book of Daniel at church. Because our leaders understand that we are lazy and shallow busy women, they have devised a way to encourage us to complete our homework.

A basket of goodies!!

Yes, if you finish your weekly homework you can select a gift from the You Go, Girl! basket. In the basket they have candles, note cards, hair accessories, lotion, etc.

let's study Daniel

What a cute headband. Why yes, it’s a prize for doing my homework.

It’s basically Bribery for Women!!

And it works. Sigh. I was determined to finish my homework, even if it meant doing FOUR lessons in one day. Pathetic!

rachel's Bible study

what a great book

Rachel is working through a Kay Arthur study on the book of John.

Of course, wouldn’t you know it every single thing I had been dealing with and struggling over this past week were specifically addressed in the daily assignments.

My Discontented Spirit
My Feelings of Discouragement and Failure
My Self-absorption

Every single one.

When the Lord sets out to speak to me and teach me a lesson, I find that He is often creative, patient and THOROUGH. Not only did I learn that I simply MUST stay in the Word in order to have the right perspective on life and my identity as a daughter of the King, I also clearly saw that God is ready and waiting to teach me if I run to Him. Only a great and sovereign God could orchestrate it so this week’s lesson would apply directly to my spiritual battles.

If only I had met with Him.
If only I had done my lesson each day.
If only I had turned to His word instead of wallowing in feelings of self-pity and discontent.

Praise the Lord that He is faithful and forgiving and welcomes me back whenever I tarry. Praise God that He loves me with compassion and that His mercies are new every day.

Because I need them.

daniel's Bible study

look at this diligent student of the word

Daniel is studying I and II Samuel in his Bible lessons.

Wouldn’t that have been a great post! Wouldn’t you have loved to read it. Wouldn’t you have been encouraged and challenged to get into the Word yourself.

That’s what I was going to write. I was. The Lord spoke to me through a friend, on Sunday, and showed me it wasn’t sleep I needed, but Him.

Spiritual Food is Better for the Soul than Sleep

Yep, that was my intended title. I had it all planned out and mostly written.

Then I fell asleep.

Really. It would be too pitiful to make this up. I went upstairs to talk to Tim, got into my snuggly warm bed, completely intending to go downstairs in a few minutes to inspire you all with my blog, and fell promptly asleep.

There’s another lesson in there somewhere, but I don’t have time to unearth it right now. I’m blogging in the middle of the day (gasp) and there are children to feed and educate.

Kathy
Project 366 – Day 43

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Morning People

The stop watch by Tim’s computer is beeping. I know what that means – 11 pm and time to go to bed. My house is quiet and still right now, it’s difficult to leave my cozy spot in front of the computer. Sleep is a good thing, but this house wakes up noisy and active in the morning.

let's go for a ride

These kids like to start the day with a loud bang!

I have to ask a few questions for you morning people (with children in the home):

Is your house quiet in the morning? How early do you have to get up in order to be ALONE?

My oldest two boys are early risers. In order to enjoy the stillness of a quiet house BEFORE they get up, I would have to be out of bed by 5:30 or 6 am. Ouch! That just doesn’t seem right.

Give me the hours between 10 and midnight anytime! We won’t even go into how often I am up PAST midnight.

Ahem. But not tonight. Not anymore because I’m a reformed Night Owl. I am a good mother who gets enough sleep and wakes up cheerful and ready for the day.

Lack of sleep = Depressed Kathy

I have found this to be true over and over again. When I get low on sleep life appears gloomier and gloomier. My perspective turns negative and I’m overwhelmed by life.

How can such a small thing as sleep be so important?

david and sarah stick together

Sarah and David are buddies!

Has anybody noticed yet that this blog is really about nothing at all and the longer I sit around writing it, the more I am delaying actually going to bed.

Did I mention I am a Night Owl with serious Denial Issues?

Night!
Kathy
Project 366 – Day 40

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Prayers, Rain Clouds and Good Friends

Thank you for all the incredible prayers and comments! I am so blessed by your encouraging words.

God is good!

I got up early this morning and spent some time in the Word. Daniel joined me and we snuggled under the covers, working on our Bible study books. What an amazing treasure! I hold tight to that picture as the rest of the day seems to be filled with an awful lot of “character training” moments (ie fighting and squabbing among the children).

daniel's blanket

Don’t try to separate Daniel from this coverlet.

The rain clouds parted this afternoon and, miraculously, the sun burst on the scene. It was glorious! I immediately sent all five children outside to play (run around, ride bikes, do something other than tell me the latest misdeed your brother or sister has committed).

not the sun!

The sun is too much for some people. Or maybe it’s the photo crazy mother that is too much. Hmmm.

Even though I hear the rain coming down steadily now, I can see and feel the warmth of today’s sunshine in my memory.

Late in the afternoon, a friend called to chat. We were in the middle of school (ALWAYS, it seems) but I wanted to talk and it was nearly the end of the day so I snuck (sneaked?) away and had a wonderful conversation. It was just what I needed. The kids were downstairs working on the last of their school books, the sun was shining through the big windows of the upstairs bedroom, and I had an encourager on the phone.

I worked my way through the piles of mess that have been building up in the master bedroom for weeks now (maybe months). I bagged and labeled kids’ clothes, picked up toys, put away laundry, and soaked up the words of affirmation from my dear friend.

You have wonderful children.
You are working hard at school and accomplishing all sorts of things. Your standards are high and are meeting your goals
You ARE a good mom. I have heard and seen you encourage and affirm your children.
I have been in your home and I know that you and Tim are building an amazing family together.
Despite what it feels like sometime, things are not crazy and overwhelming, you are not selfish and lazy, and these times will not last forever.

Oh, it was such sweetness to my soul. Jennifer, thank you for ministering to me. Thank you for letting me vent and rant and fuss about the responsibilities of life. It was lovely talking to you, having a little bit of time away from the children and tackling the (seemingly overwhelming) mess in my room.

Not only was I blessed and encouraged, I was challenged to think about how I use my words. Do I bless other people and affirm them? Do I let God speak through me and be His loving voice? When I know a friend is hurting and the Lord prompts me to reach out, do I listen?

headache, Rach?

Sometimes the day is long and the work exhausting.

May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer. (Psalm 19:14)

Thank you, again, to all of you who prayed and encouraged me! You are a true gift.

Kathy

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A Small Request

It’s late and I still have things I want to do before I go to sleep. I want to blog about the yummy taco dinner we had last night and the secret twist I discovered in keeping costs down. I need to make Tim’s breakfast. I should do laundry and tidy up a little bit. I want to read the 5 blogs I have open in my browser and catch up on the latest posts.

Can you tell I am having a VERY hard time making my 11 pm (or even 11:30) bedtime this week. I’ve been slowly pushing the alarm clock back later and later in the morning.

This is not good, especially as the thing I end up cutting out of my day is my time with the Lord.

Arghhh!! Definitely NOT good.

gimme a hug

I know exactly how you feel, Little Buddy.

So, if you read this and you are a praying person, I would ask that you pray for me. Pray that I would remain focused on my priorities, that I would have discipline in my day, that I wouldn’t neglect my Bible study time.

It has been a cold and rainy week with no end to this particular weather trend in sight. Pray I will be wise in parenting my slightly stir crazy children and loving in how I manage their (seemingly never ending) sibling disputes.

I am greedy for prayer and thank you so dearly for lifting me up!!

Kathy
Project 366 – Day 37

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