Now it is a Monday, and I’m writing from my desk during my lunch break. Over the weekend I had the opportunity to go to Pennsylvania to visit my Grandma (and sundry other relatives) in celebration of her 91st birthday. My Uncle wrote a general invitation for the party, and when I saw it I couldn’t resist the impulse to go. I found a cheap flight and flew out on Friday night to Dulles. Arriving Saturday morning I rented a car and drove up to Mechanicsburg, enjoying the birthday party in unseasonably warm weather. I was able to spend a good bit of time with my Grandma and also had the chance to visit with four of my cousins and one uncle (and assorted spouses and children). I then drove back down to Virginia and caught a flight home early Sunday morning. I think it was a very worthwhile trip … not much chance to sleep (center seats on the plane both directions), but otherwise full of joy and good memories. I realized that I haven’t been to that part of the country for five years — it was particularly fun to re-connect with my cousins and to see how fast their children are growing.

Driving up route 15 from Virginia in the early morning sunshine I had the opportunity to see some beautiful foliage … I didn’t realize how much I had missed those reds and oranges here in the Northwest. Deciduous trees here tend to stick to a rather sickly and apologetic yellow when they change their leaves … as if they didn’t dare to call attention to themselves among the surrounding conifers. Some time I would like to live in Virginia again, although I hear that the housing prices are fierce anywhere near DC.

One of the things I liked about growing up as an Army brat was having lived a lot of different places. I remember having a hard time adjusting to life in the ‘States’ when we moved back from Germany, but I still don’t think I would trade my childhood for one in which I lived in the same town throughout my school years. Mark was less fortunate than I, perhaps … moving from Germany in the middle of high school must have been hard. Truth is, we didn’t really move around that much, most of the time staying 3 or 4 years at a given assignment.

My children seem to be of a different temperament, though; I know it was hard for all of them to move from the Duckabush. When I think of their little lives and potentially uprooting them to live somewhere else, it seems unlikely the payoff would be enough to justify the disruption. Still, I wish they could experience some of the variety that I did when I was growing up. Thinking about it, I wonder how much of my experience was tied to the vacations we took, and less with where we actually lived. Kathy and I are such homebodies … we don’t usually take the kids anywhere out of town unless it is to visit family.

Faces only a family would love. Knowing Kathy was taking a picture, Daniel stuffed his entire burger in his mouth. And we wonder why we’re not invited out, much.
One thing I would really like to do is to go to Europe with Kathy some time. While we have each traveled in various parts of Europe individually, we haven’t shared any of those experiences. It would be cool to take a week or ten days and see some of the places she has enjoyed and show her some of the places I like. I would like her to see Salzburg and the Interlaaken area and Venice and the Peleponesian coast of Greece, for starters. Of course, we’d have to parcel off the kids and find a way to pay for the trip, but it is something I’d really like to do … I’m tempted to make it one of my ‘official’ goals.

I’ve been attending this men’s Bible Study on Thursday mornings … the pastor has us reading The Measure of a Man by Gene Getz. Today I read a couple of chapters at lunchtime … seems like the author is stepping through the scriptural requirements to be an elder or deacon as a blueprint for what it means to be a man of God. One thing the pastor has been advocating has been the setting of measurable goals. I haven’t tended to be a very goal-oriented person … I tend to drift through life rather than charge at it with any particular agenda. It will be interesting to see if a) I can bring myself to set and pursue some goals, and b) if I like or embrace the whole goal process.

The other night Kathy and I were talking about what it would be like to travel together, as her folks did this summer during their sabbatical. So much of our life is tied up with our children … it makes me wonder what it would be like to have them grown and off on their own. I don’t resent them, and I’m in no hurry to have them out the door … but sometimes I worry that we won’t know what to say to each other when the kids are no longer so central to our world.

My Beloved

The last two evenings the kids were staying with my folks … Kathy and I just snuggled down and watched movies. Last night we bought takeout Mexican food … it was very companionable to eat at our big table, just the two of us. Our fireplace stopped working the other day, but we’ve been watching movies in the other room anyway, sitting on our double recliner, ‘Big Blue’.

I’m starting to get used to this early schedule … it is much more cheerful if I can get into bed at a decent hour. Kathy and I started a point system to encourage ourselves to make good choices … I get a point if I can manage to get into bed by 9:30 pm. My productivity drops off pretty sharply if I am tired … there is enough of an impermanent feel to this job that I don’t feel I can really afford very many unproductive days. Come to think of it, being less than alert on a workday is a little like stealing office supplies … you’re not likely to be caught, but it is dishonest anyway. Maybe I should give myself two points for getting to bed early.

Kathy asked me, “What are you going to do with your points?” I told her, “Squander them, of course!” I suppose we should think of something to do that will encourage us to make the right choices … although maybe the mere acquisition of points will be enough of a motivation. From a competitive perspective, there is no way I’ll ever get enough points to match Kathy, since she is working so hard on the food plan she has adopted. I’m a little awed by the discipline she has shown in the last seven months.

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Last Monday marked the beginning of my new four-day work-week arrangement, and I was off on Valentine’s Day. I had discussed it in advance with the kids, and they were very excited. David kept saying to me: “When will it be the day when we have the big special day for ALL the kids?”

Just ’cause you’re home-schooled, doesn’t mean you can’t ride on a bus once in a while. But how many kids get to drive it?

Although at first I had thought to go to Mt. Rainier or Mt. St. Helens, the weather was not optimal and there was a volcanic activity warning in effect at Mt. St. Helens. Reluctantly, Kathy and I agreed that the children hadn’t been that bad, so we decided to play it safe and go to the Hands-on Children’s Science Museum in Olympia. We opened a few presents to celebrate Valentine’s Day, and then we got ready go. Kathy decided to stay home, so I set off with all five kids in our little red van. She concealed her sorrow at being left behind by shoving us out the door and locking the deadbolt, laughing maniacally. We all felt very sorry for her.

There was some kind of protest at the Capitol, and the museum parking was taken … we had a terrible time finding a parking spot. I was about to give up but the kids all prayed for a spot, and we found one on the street nearby. I was reminded of my dear friend and adoptive mom, Sue Casner, who taught me that God cares about the little things like parking places.

We had a few things to talk over with the legislature, and then we ate lunch.

The hands-on museum was fairly small and compact, but had many interesting exhibits, with something for all the kids from Sarah to Joshua. I took a few moments when we first arrived to talk over the building’s security with the museum receptionist. Apparently there was only one non-alarmed exit (right by the receptionist’s station) and they had a procedure for when one of the other doors was opened. Employees were assigned to go out each of the doors and had walkie-talkies by which they could communicate with the other workers … it seemed a good system which would prevent easy theft of a child. There were a few times when I lost sight of one child or another, but each time I found my errant child pretty quickly … the building felt secure and our family comprised about a fourth of their patrons for the duration of our visit.

Daniel helped out at the dentist’s office, scheduling appointments and ruthlessly filing insurance claims. If you look closely, you can see him printing “Services NOT covered — OUT OF NETWORK”

The kids loved it. We bought a year’s membership, since I think we will definitely want to go back at least once more during the year, and the price structure was such that two visits will ‘pay’ for the membership with room to spare. It is a great rainy-day activity, especially when the rest of the benighted kids are whiling away their days in public schools. I picked Monday as my day off partly because I figured most schools won’t tend to have field trips on Mondays … it seems to me it would be hard to get kids to remember the field trip over the weekend, and so Monday trips would cause logistical problems with permission forms, attire and lunches.

Sadly, it was determined that Joshua required extensive dental work, including several root canals and extractions. “Hurry it up with that novocaine!” shouts Dr. Rachel. “This guy’s about to make a run for it!”

Sarah got her shirt and jacket wet in the water table before I noticed, and we were short on drinks for the kids (I, of course, had a Diet Dr. Pepper). Kathy had packed us a lunch, and we ate outside in the sunshine, a nice break from the museum.

It was a pretty good day. We were gone for a little more than five hours, and Kathy got some down-time for herself … I’m sure to her it seemed we were only gone a little while. In some ways, it doesn’t really matter what we do on Mondays as long as we are out of the house … Kathy doesn’t get much of a break from the kids, between being a Mom of five kids and homeschooling.

The kids loved playing with the ambulance and ER — Sarah’s real-life experience last September helped her to play the part of a patient convincingly.

One of the activities they had was a set of giant Builder Boards that you could use to build a play structure (like a little log house). Rachel and Daniel built a house without a door or window, so of course I had to prove that I could do one better, and I built a house with both. One of the museum workers passed by and remarked how many people forgot the door … I felt very smug. Then she noted that the average age of usual builders was 5 1/2, and I felt substantially less smug. It has been much too long since I was able to play with Lincoln Logs.

A lot of the pictures that I took were blurry, perhaps because of the low lighting in the museum. I was rather disappointed, because some of them would have been pretty good, if it weren’t for the fact that the kids were nearly indistinguishable. But hey, they were good pictures. Really.

“Captain, she won’t take much more! She’s breakin’ up!

At the end of our visit we stopped by the souvenir shop, and bought some healthy snacks (ice cream sandwiches and cans of pop) and devoured them in the sunny little café area at the front of the museum. Kathy’s had the kids reading nutrition books ever since, trying to undo my influence. We piled back in our van and headed home … a good time was had by all.

Now I’m a little worried … can I come up with another Field Trip that won’t be a disappointment? The weather has been clear and cold this week, but I’d really like to do something a little less sedentary than a museum. Each morning as I ride the train, Mt. Rainier calls me with its snow-covered slopes and majestic beauty. But they require snow-chains on some of the roads this time of the year, and I don’t have any (or any desire to purchase a set). Then there is Pioneer Farms, another hands-on exhibit that has been very popular with the kids in past years, but one that has some dependency on good weather. Although it has been sunny all week, now that the weekend is upon us, it is supposed to cloud over. I guess we can have no complaints … once again, we’ve had an unseasonably mild winter, both in terms of temperature and rain. It is hard to remember that we live in Washington, sometimes … this place is more like San Diego!

Sarah really loved the water table — I told Kathy we really needed to remember to pack extra clothes for her next time.

Of course, nearly every kind of activity costs money, which is discouraging in these months after Christmas, when money is tight and bills are thick upon the ground. But I am enjoying the kids so much these days, it seems very much worth it. At the end of the day (or my life) I doubt I’ll regret outings like this or the money spent. Nobody seems to request tombstone captions like, “If only I’d spent more time at the office!”

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This December 9th our dear daughter, Rachel, turned nine years old. We all thought it was very fun that she was turning nine on the ninth. Birthdays, as you know (if you’ve been reading this blog over the past year) are something to be celebrated in a big way in our family. We had a birthday party in the works, but the birthday girl and the Birthday Coordinator couldn’t come to an agreement on the plan. It was amusing to watch the two (Rachel and Joshua) work it out — or rather not work it out. Rachel wanted an animal-themed party, but we’ve done that before and the subject was ‘boring’ to Joshua. The ideas Joshua presented were rejected by Rachel. Finally I suggested we have a friend over for the weekend and abandon the whole party idea.

Everyone agreed with that plan and I was off the hook for party decorations and organizing. Whew!

This year Rachel’s birthday fell on a Thursday (excellent planning on her part) so Tim was able to be around for the whole day. Joshua got up early and fixed a lovely breakfast for Rachel (and the rest of us). Rachel decided to have her breakfast ‘on the couch’ rather than in bed — probably due to the fact she’s now sleeping in a bunk bed. It makes it a little difficult to serve breakfast, and it is hard to explain syrup stains on the ceiling.

Princess for the Day, low-budget crown notwithstanding.

We took the day off from school and Rachel had a wonderful time playing with all of her presents. A friend had given her a Strawberry Shortcake horse the day before, so Daniel and I arranged for Tim to pick up another horse and a little doll to join the set. Rachel was so surprised that she would get some coordinating toys. She was delighted with her new things and spent the day wearing her new in-line skates and playing with toys.

In the afternoon Tim’s mom called and said she had a birthday cake for the Nine Year Old Girl and asked if she could bring it over. My goodness! No party to plan, a birthday breakfast chef in the family, and a gorgeously decorated cake delivered to my door. What more could a mother ask?

To Rachel’s sadness, this is the only kitten she’ll be getting this year.

Rachel opened some presents with Grandma (Grandpa was out at the property working on the Retreat Center building). We had dinner in the dining room with our fancy china plates and crystal glasses. We even enjoyed sparkling cider with our meal. Dinner consisted of Rachel Favorites—macaroni and cheese (Kraft box), pears and little smokies. I’m almost embarrassed to write the menu.

Kids, don’t try this at home — leave it to the paid professionals.

After dinner Tim’s mom came over to join us for cake and ice cream. It was a lovely celebration! The next day Leanne came over to spend the weekend. She joined us in two plays, a neighborhood party, and church. A busy, fun weekend.

I’m very proud of the young girl Rachel is growing up to be. She loves the Lord, is eager to read and learn new things. She loves honesty and justice. She cares for her little brother and sister and delights in their sweet ways. She can reach beyond her age and play with Joshua as well as relax and have fun with Daniel. She is a very satisfactory daughter and I’m pleased to be her mother.

Sisters forever.

Lately we’ve been enjoying some mother/daughter shopping times in the evening. One night there was an accident at a store downtown and Rachel was eager to return home safely. She said to me, “In case we don’t make it home, I want you to know I love you. You have been a good mother to me.”

Precious moments.

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Another Monday has come upon us, and I find myself unready. Weekends never seem to contain enough hours to do what I need to do. I had hoped to work on our Christmas newsletter, to wrap (and mail off) presents to out-of-town relatives, do several hours of work, and pay some bills; yet none of these things happened. I guess those tasks weren’t as important as I thought. I rarely seem to do a good job in managing my time … procrastination seems to be my destiny. Of course, this is a time of year when most people feel the squeeze … I suppose it is nice to know that I am not alone.

Sarah aspires to a career as a vocalist.

Yesterday we re-visited the Lake City church … I still find myself holding on to the church we have been attending for the past month or so. We attended a Sunday school class as well as the worship service. The longer time in the nursery was apparently hard on Sarah and David … when I came to pick them up after church, Sarah looked like she was ready to cry at any moment. Usually our kids are so comfortable and easy in nurseries … it made me sad to look at her tragic little face, even though I know it was mostly an act. I’m guessing there was some kind of altercation with another child … when I checked on them earlier, Sarah and David were both scowling blackly at a little girl who sat next to them during Song Time. It is funny to see David be so protective of his little sister … I guess, like brothers everywhere, he bitterly resents anyone poaching on his exclusive prerogative to beat up on Sarah.

David often ‘reads’ to Sarah — he is a good brother, no matter how I may malign him.

We had Leanne over for the weekend, which always shakes up our family dynamic. Rachel doesn’t do well when she gets tired, and the girls do tend to stay up late, talking. Leanne is so gracious and easy to be with, sometimes we hardly notice that she is there. Joshua complains, though: “If you had to ‘adopt’ another girl, did you have to pick one that is taller than me?” I guess a couple of inches make quite a difference.

Leanne and Rachel, thick as thieves.

Come to think of it, I recently had a similar experience. Before attending the annual Scrooge musical at a local church (a near-Broadway production, with 100+ in the cast) we attended a Christmas party at a nearby friends’ home. When I walked in the door, I immediately noticed that all of the men present were taller than me by a good three inches, at least. Honoring a house preference, I had taken off my shoes, so I was bereft of even that half-inch advantage. At 5’11″ and over 200 pounds, I don’t usually consider myself a small person … it was strange to be so comparatively short, if not particularly less bulky.

Two of my girls, in the days before Big Blue (our new double-recliner) was delivered.

The Scrooge Musical presented by Covenant Celebration Church in Puyallup was glorious, as usual. Rachel says that since we have now attended three years in a row, this has become a “Tradition”. The performance is a distinct departure from some of the more secular interpretations of Dickens’ A Christmas Carol — there is a strong (almost heavy-handed) Christian message in the play that only the most determined could overlook. Although I am very fond of Dickens’ original work, I think that the Christ-centered version is a considerable improvement … long-term change in Scrooge’s character is only believable within the context of a changed heart and the power of the Holy Spirit. This year there were few surprises, and I found that much of my enjoyment came in observing my children. Joshua, in particular, seemed to deeply savor the performance, frequently laughing so loudly that I could clearly hear him over the sometimes-deafening music. The simulated snow falling on the audience at the end of the performance was a big hit with kids and grown-ups alike … there is something magical about snow, even the soap-bubble variety.

Friday night we attended a local amateur production of The Best Christmas Pageant Ever, a charming story about a church Christmas pageant that is transformed by the participation of a family of un-churched thug-children. Smoking cigars in the ladies room and guzzling the communion grape juice, the six Herdman children end up playing all of the major roles in the pageant. As it is unveiled to them, the Herdmans react to the Christmas story in ways that seem funny to those of us more familiar with the story … Joseph wants to threaten the innkeeper, and the three wise men make plans for a commando raid on Herod’s palace. But it is the oldest Herdman girl, playing Mary, who experiences the deepest change, holding the plastic doll tenderly as she comes to grips with the awesome vulnerability of the Savior. It was a very poignant moment, and I was privileged to see it. Thanks, Mom and Dad, for buying our tickets and watching Sarah and David!

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