Category Archives: Kathy

Those Who Look for Beauty Find It

This weekend I was invited to join a friend at a homeschooling conference in Seattle. Tim cheerfully sent me on my way (no doubt plotting to get his hands on the blog) and off I went. It was a lovely time of fellowship with an old friend; long conversations about parenting, faith and marriage; homeschool shopping, instruction and encouragement and of course some pampering.

mirror, mirror on the wall

We found this wonderful little spa during our travels. The decor was lovely and I was especially drawn to the mirror in the back.

Between us, Martha and I have 11 children. That’s quite a collection of little (and not so little) voices and messes and concerns and needs and hearts in our care. I hardly need say that finding time for quiet and rejuvenation is pretty rare. How much more precious to have an extended length of time in which to reconnect with a friend and be away from the responsibilities of life.

To make the whole weekend all the more delightful, Martha treated me to a birthday pedicure.

pink toes

We don’t usually look to feet for beauty but dark pink polish certainly helps. More importantly it is where my feet take me that reflects beauty – do I serve my family, do I walk toward the needy, do I live out the gospel in the steps I take?

A little bit of pampering was the perfect way to start the weekend. No one in the salon asked me to get them a drink or find their lost sock or punish their brother or wipe up their spilled ketchup. Not once. It was actually very quiet.

Thank you for the lovely birthday present, Martha!!

kathy and martha

There is great beauty in relationships that have been tested in the fire and redeemed through God’s faithfulness and healing.

As I return from the homeschooling conference and a weekend away from my duties and responsibilities as a wife and mother, I am challenged to think about what I look for in my children and my husband. Do I look for the beauty in them or do I only see their faults and failures?

I want to look for the beauty of God working in my children and my husband. I want to see their hearts grow more and more in love with Jesus. I want to notice the laughter and joy more and the mess less. I want to encourage purity and innocence and integrity and faith and LOVE in my family.

I am going to look for the beauty that comes from the Lord because I know that He is faithful and will complete the work that He has begun in my children, my husband and myself.

It’s good to be home.

Kathy

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The party isn’t over yet

My theory is: as long as there is another present to be opened, then it’s still your birthday. My brother Thom’s birthday is on the 31st of July, so growing up there was a very definite end to my birthday celebrations. He did his best to arrive on the scene at the very end of July, but still, he was constantly encroaching on my birthday. These days, with Thom safely miles away, I am free to claim the entire month of July for my birthday.

Of course, I share one or two days with Sarah.

After all, I’m not greedy.

pmge's

Timothy, Elizabeth and Mark are obviously also very excited about my birthday.

In all fairness, Sarah was the one who had a whole basket full of presents left to open. The week of camp was busy and wet, wet, wet. Did I already mention how it rained and rained every day but one? I don’t want to complain, but the middle of July is NOT the time it should be raining. Even in western Washington. Aren’t there rules about this sort of thing? Something about rain and birthdays and standards of summer weather? Somehow there wasn’t ever time to open the rest of the birthday presents. No doubt it was because of the rain.

Today we all gathered for one last party celebration. Yes, it was raining. Sarah and I did our best to ignore the lousy weather and concentrate on more important things, like presents and being spoiled rotten.

look at that birthday girl

On Tuesday, the day after her birthday, Sarah told me, “I miss being four.”

When we got home this evening, there was a huge box on the porch addressed to me. More presents? See how a birthday can be stretched out to last and last.

And there are still cards to open on the mantle.

Life is good.

Now if it would just stop raining.

Kathy
Project 365 – Day 202

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A Twice-Happy Birthday

Today is a big day in our home, as we celebrate the birth of our sweet Sarah, who turned five today. It is also a day of great celebration as we celebrate the birth of Kathy, who graciously shares this day with her daughter.

Birthday girls
But from everlasting to everlasting the LORD’s love is with those who fear him, and his righteousness with their children’s children – with those who keep his covenant and remember to obey his precepts. (Psalm 103:17-18)

We opened one present for each of the birthday girls before the family headed off for a week at camp — a CD for Kathy, and a couple of little people for Sarah to play with on the drive.

Once we were all ensconced in the Duckabush house, we started to open presents in earnest. As the clock sliced away at the minutes before I had to get to bed (I have to work this week, and so am staying home while everyone else is at camp, sniff, sniff!) I began to run into some peculiar resistance. Kathy didn’t want to open her presents. She loves the anticipation of her birthday so much, that she can hardly stand to let it end. As we have tried to follow a budget this year, she knows this will be a sparser year than some, and I had to promise her that I had at least one present still in the mail before she would agree to open most of her gifts.

Sarah and her new Kelly dolls
Sarah can always count on a brother or two hovering nearby to ‘help’ her with her gift-opening

Sarah had no such compunctions, but we did end up limiting her gift-opening so as not to overwhelm her with the generosity of her siblings and over-indulgent parents.

Rachel and Sarah bought their mama a new tea kettle, something she has wanted for a good while. Daniel and David went in on a fancy new frying pan, one with a handle that can stand the heat of the oven (in case she wants to make a frittata, I’m told). Joshua bought some music CDs, as we renew our efforts to satisfy Kathy’s love for variety in Christian music.

A new towel ... how ... thoughtful!
Some years ago I bought Kathy a colorful beach towel for her birthday, and eventually inherited it as my bath towel. The towel is starting to fade with age, and so …

I looked up ‘birthday’ on my favorite online Bible reference site and discovered that the only recorded scriptural accounts of people celebrating the day of their birth (apart from Jesus and the three Magi) seem to involve Pharoah (the good one, who was smart enough to hire Joseph) and a rather gruesome tale about Herod’s birthday party. Celebrating birthdays doesn’t seem to be much of a big deal in scripture, except for this rather graphic reference in the book of Ezekiel, when God reminds Israel that she was nothing before he chose her:

On the day you were born your cord was not cut, nor were you washed with water to make you clean, nor were you rubbed with salt or wrapped in cloths. No one looked on you with pity or had compassion enough to do any of these things for you. Rather, you were thrown out into the open field, for on the day you were born you were despised. Then I passed by and saw you kicking about in your blood, and as you lay there in your blood I said to you, “Live!” I made you grow like a plant of the field. You grew up and developed and became the most beautiful of jewels. (Ezekiel 16:4-7a)

My two birthday girls were not despised on the day of their births, but it is sobering to think that, except for God’s kindness toward each of us, we would be ‘thrown out into the open field’ to die, forever cut off from his glory because of our sin. Remembering our helplessness and God’s gracious salvation through His son, Jesus, it seems very fitting that we celebrate Jesus’ birth with such lavish display and outpouring of good will toward our fellow man. Kathy and Sarah’s birthdays are well-situated at the other end of the year, when our budget and shopping stamina is not so exhausted from Christmas.

Kathy examines her new frying pan
This year the kids seemed to have definite ideas about what to buy their mother, which was a great relief to me.

For several months, Kathy has been hinting about her desire for Photoshop Elements, a software package that she hopes to use to enhance some of her digital camera pictures. In June, she stripped the veils off her hints and began making less guarded comments, perhaps fearing that I would somehow not realize what she wanted for her birthday. Spitefully, I maintained an air of insouciance and bland disinterest, desperately clutching at the hope that I could still give her the software as a surprise. I’ve never been very good at insouciance, as it turns out, so I’m sure she was not surprised to receive Photoshop Elements as her ‘big’ present. Smug and delighted: yes, surprised: no. At least I can spell ‘insouciance’, which is no small thing in this day and age.

Kathy's
Now she has to contain her glee until she gets home, since the software will probably not install on our old laptop. And she thought opening the gifts would end the anticipation!

As the household settled down, Kathy persuaded the passel of boys in the next room to brush their teeth, with some success. It should be a fun week of Camp and Cousins!

Three Boys a-Brushing
Teeth-brushing, tongue-brushing, what’s the difference, as long as you’re sincere?

Kathy with her little 'helpers'
He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD. (Proverbs 18:22)

Thanks be to God for His abundant favor and blessing to me! Thanks, Mamie and Grand-dad, for raising such a godly and delightful daughter!

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Old Friends

Bible Study Fellowship has enriched my life in many ways. It has deepened my knowledge of scripture. It has provided a place for my children to learn about the character of God and His Word. I’ve been blessed by the teaching of wonderful godly women. I’ve had years of excellent small group leaders as well as times with poor ones. I’ve grown and studied and learned under all of them.

One precious treasure BSF has given me is some dear, dear friendships. This week I was able to visit one of these friends. Amy and I met in our BSF class years ago (I’m afraid to add up the years). We lived near each other, had similar backgrounds of growing up in the church, and were both in the beginning of raising our young families. I had two small children and she had one. Now I have five and she has four. Where have the years gone?

amy and kathy

Every year we return to Michigan for a visit, I always carve out the time to see Amy and her sweet family. It is such a joy to be with an old friend (not that either of us are old, of course not). The conversation is natural and nearly without pause. The only interruption comes from the children. After we had been there for some time, Amy’s oldest asked her, “How long have you been talking?” I’m sure in his mind we couldn’t possibly have anything left to say. Silly child. :)

Amy’s new home is beautiful, relaxed and comfortable. Amy is just the same herself. It was delightful spending the afternoon with her. The children played inside, went for a walk to the park, had popsicles, came inside, watched tv, played games, and then went back outside for more fun. I tried to borrow Amy’s set of clippers to do Daniel’s hair. She got it out and then remembered she needed to use them this week. At the last minute (literally the children were all getting into the van) I decided to cut Daniel’s hair. I can’t believe I forgot to ask Rachel to take pictures. We all went to the back yard (except Joshua who thought it would be more fun to wilt, swelter and melt in the van, waiting for us) and I cut Daniel’s hair right there on the patio.

bunch of cute kids

You know it’s a true friend when you can borrow hair clippers and give your son an impromptu hair cut in the back yard. Tim teased me and said we sure like to go a long way for a hair cut. First it was the girls, and now Daniel’s got his Michigan cut. Who’s next?? The only downside is it’s going to be expensive to continue flying to Michigan to keep up with my highlights and the rest of the family’s trims.

Thankfully I have good friends that are always ready with an open home and welcome smile.

Thanks for the lovely visit, Amy!!

Kathy
Project 365 – Day 170

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P365 – Day 132 (A Mother’s Day Gift)

Tim and the children went off for the day, the whole entire day, leaving me alone. Alone. Ha, ha, ha, ha. Sorry. I’m still a bit giddy with the luxury of it all. So I spent most of the time working on laundry and cleaning, it was quiet. If it wasn’t quiet it was because I was listening to music or lectures or sermons on my new, super cool Mother’s Day MP3 player.

Did I mention I was alone all day?

Here are the sweet kiddos who made me a Mother.

picnic

Picnic lunch out on the property.

There was a work party and board meeting out at the Retreat Center. The logs and stone are slowly being added to the building. It’s very exciting! The new, hand crafted, door is gorgeous!!

logs

door

Is there something wrong about celebrating some of the Mother’s Day weekend totally alone, no children in sight? Thankfully I have a wonderfully understanding and supportive husband who knows I rarely have any time to myself and is thrilled to give me the gift of time. Since, tomorrow we are hosting a party for our Small Group and I will surely be busy with cooking and cleaning duties, Tim was pleased to let me have today “off.”

Ah. I washed laundry, swept floors, organized and put away clothes and papers, read e-mail, talked to one of my brothers, sorted Polly Pockets and Playmobil, did more and more and more laundry (I still have at least 5 loads before I’m all caught up), listened to an excellent talk on evangelism and 2 long sessions on parenting and even had time to begin one of my dad’s sermons (I am crazy about this new MP3 player). Some people might think this sounds like a work day but I was alone and didn’t have to take care of anyone but myself. I didn’t have to go anywhere or make any significant decisions (other than ‘Polly Pocket in this bin and Playmobil into the other’). I ate lunch at 2 pm and dinner at 8 pm. I stayed in my sloppy clothes the whole day (never did get a shower).

Truly a day for the special pages. :) I hope your Saturday was just as lovely.

Kathy

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