Category Archives: Family

Growing Kids and Raising Gardens

Today was a glorious Family Day. We were delighted to have the oldest two children home again, and I was determined, now that they’re home again, to spend the day doing something as a family.

Pool Buddies
David and Sarah serve as poster-children for sweetness toward each other.

“Don’t go to the book sale,” I begged Kathy on Tuesday, as she considered a scheme to attend a home-school curriculum sale on Saturday. “The kids will finally be back — we should all stay home together.”

The weather reports have been rather conflicted about this Saturday — first they said it would be partly cloudy, then they said it would be fully sunny, then yesterday they claimed there would be showers. I got up late, just in time to see some clouds rolling in. “It’s been beautifully sunny so far,” Joshua assured me, as I staggered downstairs, bleary-eyed.

Kathy wields the shears
Although odds were running 3:1 in favor of the bush, Kathy prevailed.

“If you want to see the sun today, you’d better get outside,” I informed Kathy gloomily. How wrong I was! The sun shone all day long, and the sky remained blue and mostly cloudless.

Rachel cuts boards for our raised-bed garden
Building the raised-bed garden was reminiscent of playing with Lincoln Logs.

We spent the day working on the yard and building a garden planter or two. It was a lot more fun than it sounds, and there were many chances for laughter and fun. The kids helped me plant a bunch of my never-ending crop of tomato seedlings, and Joshua shifted dirt from the driveway to the garden.

A load o' dirt
My oldest son returns home Thursday night, and six cubic yards of dirt are delivered early Friday morning. Coincidence? Maybe.

Kathy weed-whacked and pruned bushes and cooked delicious meals for us; whenever she could, she sneaked away to read her Dave Ramsey book.

Taking credit where little credit was due
Joshua was actually the one who filled the planter with dirt, but (since he doesn’t really like having his picture taken) Daniel and I horned in to take credit.

At one point, Rachel was playing an elaborate game of Trivia with the three younger kids — I just had to sneak up and take a few pictures, and to eavesdrop on their game.

Rachel holds court

Rachel enjoys a good laugh
These kids really know how to enjoy each other.

We had Slurpees™, ate fried chicken and (once it began to get dark) watched most of National Treasure 2, which Kathy bought for our anniversary. I provided sherbet and some Tillamook Mud Slide ice cream, which was every bit as good as it sounds.

Planter Number 2
There were a few design flaws on the first raised-bed garden, so I’m trying again. Besides, we still have lots more dirt.

One of the “Fathers Mandates” we’ve been studying in our Growing Kids God’s Way parenting study is the establishment of family identity. We joke about matching T-shirts, but I’ve often thought that a strong and positive family identity can serve as an excellent shield against many forms of outside temptation. While I read “the chapter” to the kids tonight, we all agreed: this was a very good day to be in our family.

Tim
Project 366, Day 115

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tn_May23rd1992

Sixteen Candles

No, I’m not referring to a Brat Pack film about unrequited love and a forgotten birthday from the early 80′s. Instead, I’m privileged and delighted to celebrate the 16th anniversary of my wedding to the girl of my dreams.

Kathy and her Dad, minutes before our wedding ceremony
“Daddy, I’m not sure I want to go through with this … “

As we stood in the hallway this afternoon, sneaking a quick smooch, Kathy asked me, “Doesn’t it seem like yesterday, that we were living upstairs from Nancy in our little Stamford apartment?”

It does seem only a few years ago … I remember when it was just the two of us, and we still felt like kids, just pretending to be married people until the real grownups came home and sent us off to our rooms.

Wedding Recessional
Mr. and Mrs. Edgren take their first few steps together …

Time’s relentless current has swept us through the years, and here we are with five children, less energy, a very full and busy life, and just a little more wisdom, than when we started. In all this I have learned one important thing: to give thanks. We have so much to be thankful for, so (as any good parent will agree) I should write a thank-you note.

A Thank-You Note to God

Thank you, dear Jesus, for loving us and for saving us from our sin through your death on the cross. Thank you for adopting us into your family and giving us the Holy Spirit to guide us in joy and righteousness. Thank you for arranging our lives so that we could meet at a time when we were both capable of loving and being loved.

Thank you for protecting us from being too intimate (with others and with each other) before we were married. Thank you for blessing us with good communication skills, and with a good marriage. Thank you for teaching us how to fight gently, and for restraining our speech so we didn’t say things that would hurt each other deeply.

Thank you for giving me the ability to work and earn a good living, and thank you for helping us manage our money. Thank you for blessing us with the courage and desire to raise five children, and for giving us the fertility to conceive them and bring them into the world. Thank you for growing us in maturity and grace, and for helping us to build our faith and our love for you.

Thank you for giving us excellent examples in our parents, of marriages built for the long haul. Thank you for allowing some trouble in our lives, so that we could learn to hope and persevere. Thank you for sixteen great years of life together.

I have some regrets about my life. I wasted some years in high school, fighting spitefully with my parents. I spent nearly a decade getting through college, carelessly losing my scholarship and taking a lot more time to grow up than I should have needed. But I can’t say that I regret any of the years since I found my sweet Kathy — she has filled up my days with fun and joy and purpose and meaning, as we build our family and present it as our offering to our Lord.

Kathy at Crim Dell
They say that if you kiss a girl at the top of this bridge, you’ll be with her forever. Kathy and I took extra care to make sure.

Indeed, candles are a poor metaphor, burning out so quickly and dribbling inedible wax on the cake. Perhaps it would be better to speak of jewels in a crown, one for each year that we have enjoyed, loving and serving each other as unto the Lord. A few months ago we had the chance to honor a couple at our church who had been married some sixty-plus years. As the applause of the congregation washed over the white-haired pair, I quietly resolved, “unless the Lord takes us home, there’s Kathy and I in fifty years.”

These days many think that when marriage gets tough, they are free to walk. Others don’t bother with marriage at all, and some misguided folk even think same-sex relationships should be called ‘marriages’. Kathy and I place a high value on marriage in the sight of God, between a man and a woman, and we continue to honor our vow from that day, sixteen years ago: ‘Til death do us part. My heart still skips a beat when I look at her sometimes … not because she’s still a 21-year-old hottie, but because our love and trust and investment in each other has grown and grown over these years.

Happy Anniversary, Beloved.

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Come Home, Beloved Children

My world traveling children shall soon be on their way home. Poor David (age 7) is having a difficult time waiting.

Mom, I just can’t go for two weeks without my big brother, he moaned, draping himself across the arm of my chair this afternoon. It’s much, much too long. I’m desperately missing him.

Sarah refused to sleep in her room alone. I’m too scared to sleep by myself, Mommy. She spent nearly the entire portion of Joshua and Rachel’s absence in Daniel and David’s room. Lately she has taken to counting the days until their return on the calendar. She gives us frequent updates, which are vigorously analyzed by her older brothers.

You can’t count TODAY. Today is already happening and so you have to start with tomorrow.
No, I think you count today because today isn’t over.

come home soon!

Amidst all of the eager anticipation, Tim and I got the news that Air Norway was on strike. Well, isn’t that an unpleasant pickle. After much scurrying about, the travelers had a Plan B. Instead of flying out of Norway, they will take a 9 hour train ride to Oslo and then catch their flight to Frankfurt. From Frankfurt to DC and from DC to Seattle. My goodness, won’t they be a weary bunch.

we'll wait all night for your return

We are eager to hug them and have them back under our own roof. A tremendous thanks to Mark and Elizabeth, the ever gracious and beloved aunt and uncle, who hosted our intrepid explorers and provided a wonderful vacation for them. And, of course, another overwhelming thank you to Grandma and Grandpa, without whom this entire adventure would not have been possible.

We are incredibly blessed with dear, dear family!

And Thursday night our family will be whole again.

Kathy
Project 366 – Day 142

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Would You Buy a Plant From These Boys

I don’t know. Aren’t kids supposed to stick to lemonade stands?

take a plant or two

Just two honest salesmen, trying to make a living.

Although, come to think of it, I haven’t seen very many lemonade stands around these days. Have we filled up our children’s time so fully that they don’t have idle afternoons available for sitting by the curb and hoping for customers?

Is it more “productive” for children to be involved in sports, classes or structured social outings? I hear my own children beg for play dates and outings at the park on Saturday afternoons and wonder when they will learn about work if they are always so busy playing? Am I actually doing them a disservice by allowing entertainment to be the main focus of their free time?

Friday was a gorgeous day here in Washington. Tim took the day off to be with the children while I sold books at a used curriculum fair. Amidst their various activities, Daniel and David spent time (a LONG time) selling their tomato plants. They were hot and bored at times. They did NOT want to continue, but they persevered and succeeded in not only selling several plants but learning some important life-lessons.

david's peddling tomatoes

David was Daniel’s faithful associate during the hot afternoon of tomato selling.

Potential Lessons of the Day

  1. An engaging, friendly attitude provides a good connection with customers and generally improves business.
  2. Being fired is a real and serious threat. It’s also a motivation to stick to the job and keep working.
  3. The extent to which you invest in a project has a direct correlation to the effort others are willing to assist you.
  4. Location matters – a quiet section of a street does not yield a high amount of traffic which means the customers are few.

Our sermon today was on the topic of work. The pastor is taking the congregation through a study of Proverbs. Daniel sat in church with us, as he does each week, and took notes. As I listened to the pastor speak and watched Daniel fill in the outline, I wondered if he processed the sermon in conjunction with his experience selling tomatoes. Did he remember any of those life-lessons? Did he understand that the Lord wants him to be a diligent, hard worker, not because He is a cruel master but because He loves Daniel?

instructions for your tomato plant

Tim and Daniel created a Tomato Hand-Out full of instructions.

I want my children to view work from a godly perspective – to work with honesty and integrity, to value hard work and diligence, to avoid get rich schemes and workaholism, and above all to honor God with their work. I appreciate the opportunity to study the scriptures and then discuss the ideas with the kids.

In our Small Group this evening we talked about teaching our children Biblical principles so they have the moral reasons and understanding to govern their lives in a godly manner. A proper attitude toward work is a significant aspect of our parental training.

Now to model that same honesty, integrity and discipline in my own work.

How come no one ever told me parenting was such hard work? I was a really fun babysitter. I didn’t realize parenting was going to be layered with some much complexity and significance. The responsibility is tremendous.

tomatoes will be growing soon!

Anybody want a tomato plant?

Kathy

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Reaping and Sowing

The tomato planting continues.

david is the day's helper

I’m not sure Tim and the children are actually going to sell any of their precious plants. As the days go by, and each plant grows stronger and taller, Tim’s attachment increases.

Good morning happy plants! he choruses each day to the green jungle growing in my bedroom.

Honey, I think I’ll build some shelves in here and then I’ll have a place to grow tomatoes all year long, he told me last weekend.

Shelves, over my window seat, for tomato plants? Now isn’t that an interesting decorating approach.

Um, wasn’t the point to sell some of these plants? I asked him recently.

It’s an investment, he mumbled as he went down the row watering each of his “babies.”

get those tomatoes planted

Frankly, I’m just glad someone is teaching the children about gardening as it’s not likely to be me. Unless of course a class in Black Thumb becomes popular.

Hey Mom, do you think you can teach me to kill plants this week?
No fair! Mom said she was going to teach ME how to over water and neglect house plants next.
It’s my turn.
No, my turn.
MOM!!!

Sigh. Until then I let Tim and the children do the planting, weeding, watering and tending.

even neighbor sophie helps

Look how they even pull random neighbor children into the planting work.

My goal is to sit back and enjoy the fruits of their labor. And with prices as high as they are, a garden looks better and better. I wonder what else I can get them to plant?

Kathy
Project 366 – Day 135

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